Monthly Archives: August 2014

Open Communication in a Relationship Is Necessary

Open communication in relationships can be tough, but it is necessary. Many people do not like having those tough conversations, especially when it comes to intimate relationships. Contingent on the stage of the relationship, how long the persons have known each other, what are the alternatives to open communication? Lies? Deceit? Unhappiness? Emptiness? Cowardly acts? Adultery? Cheating? Infidelity?

7 Reasons Open Communication Is Necessary

  1. Open communication is necessary because no one is a mind reader. Because the person does not know what the other one is thinking, a person finding a way to share their thoughts is a must. Today, there are many ways to communicate. A good start for both persons to have open communication is to find the best method of communicating where their messages are clearly received the way that they were intended.
  1. Open communication can help build trust in a relationship or confirm whether trust exists at all. If trust does not exist in the relationship, the relationship will stall and eventually meet its demise. However, once trust has been established and no fear of the outcome has been solidly planted, both persons can feel comfortable discussing anything, even the toughest topics, such as finance, sexual desires, etc.
  1. Learning about each other can happen over a period of time, but open communication can help both persons to get to know each other quicker. It is great when a person likes and respects what she or he learns about a person over time, likes, dislikes, pet peeves, religious preference, income, etc. because the future of the relationship is most likely not threatened. On the other hand, one of the worst feelings is feeling like time has been wasted. Especially as people become more seasoned, time becomes more valued as great quality that is not to be lost or squandered, and less of a learning stage of life.
  1. Knowing the state of the relationship can occur with open communication. People in complicated relationships or those who have been in a relationship for years without the word commitment ever emerging or couples on the verge of divorce probably ask themselves “How did we end up like this?” To determine how the relationship will move forward and for one’s own well-being, regardless of which stage the relationship is in, it is imperative to talk openly about the status and future of the relationship.
  1. Knowing the type of bond that exists with open communication can benefit both persons. After it has been established that the relationship will move forward, the relationship can continue to grow stronger to an unbreakable bond.
  1. Accountability in the relationship can be established with open communication. Playing the “blame game” never resolves issues or conflict. Therefore, it is imperative for both persons to be the owner of their responsibilities in the relationship. If something has not been done, being accountable will help resolve the issue or conflict sooner so that it does not exasperate harmony in the relationship.
  1. Open communication can lead to a healthy relationship. The meaning of a healthy relationship is relative, but my delineation of a healthy relationship is a harmonious union where both persons have mutual respect, support and feelings for each other, do not belittle one another, and they quickly address issues and conflict by not holding in feelings and thoughts, especially those that can be detrimental to the relationship. The rewards of a healthy relationship are endless, such as when conflict sparks new lines of communication and new discoveries about each are made.When both persons agree to strive for a healthy relationship, ultimately they will gain a strong desire to maintain a healthy relationship.

7 Reasons That Open Communication Can Be Tough

  1. Uncertainty of one’s own feelings can make opening up to anybody touch. A person having to look in the mirror to figure out what she or he wants can be a tough reality in itself. Nonetheless, the person must be honest with herself or himself in order to communicate with the other person.
  1. Not knowing how to be open can definitely make open communication tough. People who do not know how to or struggle with being open can ask themselves some questions: “What is holding me back from being open? What would it take for me to be open? What would it mean to me if someone was open and honest with me?”
  1. Open communication can be tough when the person does not choose to be honest. Not wanting to be honest with the other person in the relationship starts with the person first being honest with herself or himself about every aspect of her or his life and treating the other person as she or he would like to be treated.
  1. The person not wanting to be judged can make it tough when it comes to open communication. Being judged, criticized, ridiculed or laughed at can make open communication extremely tough for some people. Confidence, knowing that no one is perfect, knowing that everyone has flaws, and knowing how much information to disclose depending on the stage of the relationship, can make open communication easier.
  1. Taking the other person’s feelings into consideration can make open communication tough. Sometimes it seems easier to just go with the flow, buying time while the situation works itself out. Fact is the situation will not work itself out. Regardless of the longevity of the relationship, treading softly but being honest and direct is best for both persons.
  1. Open communication can be tough when one or both persons are not ready to have “the talk.” No one can be forced to open up in a relationship. When that happens, both persons probably have a tougher decision to make, how to move forward with the relationship. If both persons respect each other, “the talk” must occur at some point, the sooner the better.
  1. Being afraid of the outcome can make it tough when it comes to open communication. Whether it is fear of rejection, not being able to handle the truth, never truly being prepared for the unexpected response, or fear of where the conversation will go, such as disclosures from the past, fear is fear. It is better to know than not to know, regardless of the outcome. Also, learning new information can foster personal and relationship growth.

Open communication is an important key factor to the success of a relationship. The earlier in the relationship that open communication is implemented and exercised by both persons, the sooner each person can determine whether the person is right for her or him. If the persons are not a good match, they have pertinent information to do what is best for them. If the persons are a good match for each other, the stronger the relationship will become.

~ EJay Johnson /

Note: Please feel free to share your thoughts about the necessity of open communication by leaving a comment.